Not for Odontophobics

Of course, if you didn’t know what odontophobia was and you’re reading this now, you’re kind of screwed.

It’s fear of teeth.

I want to believe these are werewolf teeth.  Please do not disillusion me, I have so few illusions left.  


This morning, instead of hemming a skirt or doing any one of a thousand other productive things, I went to the dentist.  I have some nasty history with discolored fillings that were hiding serious damage, and since I was noticing more discoloration and sensitivity, back to the dentist I went.  I got three fillings replaced, which doesn’t sound so terrible, but I am apparently impervious to Novocaine.  They gave me three treatments (which has happened before), numbing me from cheekbone to jawline.  They also gave me so much medication I had trouble swallowing for four hours afterwards — I would innocently try to swallow some wayward spit, choke, panic and cough.  It’s a fun way to spend four hours, I tell ya.

Also, all that medication?  Did jack sh*t for the pain in my actual TEETH while they were working.  I eventually just focused on the ceiling tiles and thought about cheerful things, like BDSM and Dominic Purcell freshly showered, in a towel.

Bottom line?  My teeth ARE prettier, even if one of them actually seems to hurt more now.  I also learned a fun fact — if you have one of those fancy, spendy flashlights with blue light and you shine it in your mouth, you can see your cavities through your teeth.  Assuming this is the sort of thing that amuses you.

Anyway, we’ll be back with our regularly scheduled programming in the next couple days.  The posse is finishing school this week, so hopefully I can still fit in some sewing before I’m forced to entertain them.  And if not, this is why God is a woman and she invented video games.


Posted on June 21, 2011, in my weird sense of humor. Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.

  1. Hah! You knew I had to look, didn’t you?? I have that same thing with numbing – takes for-freaking-ever and lots of it and then I’m numb for hours only to find out later that I’ve bitten a hole through my lip. I amuse myself by trying to suck through a straw.

    • The swollen feeling — like I suddenly have elephantitis of that side of my face — is usually the weirdest thing for me. I bite the inside of my cheek every single time, too.

      I’m hoping they can give me something else next visit, but I don’t really know what that would be. Laughing gas?

  2. Did NOT know that about the blue light. I’ve been trying to find a way to reduce dental costs, but diagnosis was always the problem — until now it was just touch-and-go with the drill, you know? Which inadvertantly causes more cost, because non-carcinogenic space shuttle-grade epoxy is very expensive, right?

    So thanks for the new information. This will be the only new thing I learn today, but it was worth it.

    Sorry about your teeth. I always make them shoot me up with enough painkillers (3-4 shots) so that I can’t actually feel my entire head. Then I go to sleep. But you did say they gave you a lot, so why didn’t it work on your teeth?

    Anyway, have a nice Wednesday.

    • I have no idea why the painkillers don’t work on my teeth. They work just fine on everything else — gums, tongue, throat, cheeks….

      I use the Hub’s mini Maglite to check my teeth out. The only caveat is that you can’t really see the back of your teeth that easily, and by the time something does show up it’s in the grody, diseased stage of cavity. So really, if you have pain, you just have to bite the bullet and go in (wow, that was a terrible metaphor). And don’t skip checkups if you have insurance — not worth it.

  3. Hmm, I would expect werewolf teeth to be more wolf-like, y’know, carnassials, tricuspate incisors, possibly six rather than four incisors… these are obviously the teeth of an advanced vampire subtype.

    I am very glad I have a pretty normal reaction to pain-killers, and equally glad I haven’t had to have any new fillings in about five years (and even that one was minor, compared to the crap I went through as a kid). Less glad about the permanent nerve damage I still have from when they removed my wisdom teeth some years back.

    Good luck with your horde. I’m going to ship mine off to my SIL as soon as school’s out…

    • Your science-y knowledge of teeth is impressive. I was going by the dual canines for the lupine reference, although the front teeth look more human than anything else. Could definitely be vamp.

      My MIL takes the kids for a lot of weekends throughout the year, particularly in summer. It’s the only reason we have any social life, ha.

      I had only one wisdom tooth and having it extracted was the least painful dental experience I’ve ever had. Odd, that.

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